A question about RSC

[Chacal]

- Surely you can't be serious
- I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.

[OldProf]

You should be an English teacher. Or just replace my schools English teachers.

Now you've really opened a can of worms--or perhaps a barrel of them. Although I have never officially been an English teacher, I did try to teach my theater students good English usage: mostly in vain. Do English teachers even exist anymore? Oh, I know that "English" still appears in curricula at every level of education in the U.S., but by now I very much doubt that those who teach that subject really know anything about it. As a young boy, I attended Grammar School, which subjected all of us to a rigid regimen of "Readin', Writin', and Arithmatic"; and the next line of that old song runs, "Talk to the tune of a hik'ry stick". I don't recall any actual hickory sticks, but the teachers, themselves well schooled in their subjects, kept us in line and really taught us something.

When he was still being pushed around in a stroller, my grandson Thomas Jack faced down gushing, admiring strangers by waving his small hands in the air and saying, loudly and clearly, "No adjectives!" I mention this because that phrase seems to have been prophetic. Pick up any local newspaper and you will see, even in articles attributed to the AP, "Terror tactics", "Israel army", and my personal nemesis, "Democrat politicians". (Okay, I see that puzzlement on your phiz: the correct adjectives are "Terrorist", "Israeli", and "Democratic".) And that's just a single, small, simple, sad sample of "English" as it exists today in the words of people who make their livings by abusing it.

Although capable of raving for pages on this topic, I will instead return to editing a scenario or two. "Arrivederci, darling: that's my advice to you."

[OldProf]

- Surely you can't be serious
- I am serious. And don't call me Shirley.

Vaudeville never dies!